Thursday, November 29, 2012

Comments to a 9 Month Pregnant Me

Had to record some of what has been said to me in the past few weeks...

My daughter - "That pumpkin isn't as big as mama" (referring to a HUGE HUGE pumpkin sitting in front of a restaurant)

My husband - "Ha ha" (When he couldn't find Mikayla because she was on the other side of my belly)

My mother - "You should stop eating sugar"

Stranger at church - "So are you pregnant?"

Post office man - "Ok you need stamps... how many?" (Said in a rude tone... EVERYONE should be nice to me right now)

Midwife - "You just carry larger" (In reference to me measuring 2 weeks over what I am)

Me - "It's just like riding a bike isn't it?" (To myself when I think of labor)

My dad - "Look its your little head and then BOOM baby, are you sure you aren't going to fall over?"

Violinist in church - "Ok you are done playing" (Now that my belly is in the way of my bow)

My grandpa - "How come maternity clothes are so tight fitting now?"

Starbucks woman - "Oh how nice, a Christmas surprise"

Ok... time to come out little man. I'm officially over being pregnant.

Saturday, November 24, 2012

Mikayla Rose - a big (SNIFF) girl!

Picking a Christmas Tree!
Is my baby girl seriously only 3 months and a some days away from being 3!?  I haven't written an update on Mikayla for sometime and wanted to make sure I did so before my brain is taken over by sleep deprivation.

A few days ago I was watching Mikayla play with my parents and had to hold back tears... I can't believe how big she is now. She has turned into a little kid right in front of my eyes... I have to stop myself and just stare or I am going to miss her transformation!

I will always treasure the past three months we have shared... being together all day, every day! My quitting work could not have come at a better time and I am so so glad to have had so much alone time with her before baby brother makes his voice known. The beginning of our journey was difficult here in PA... I think we were trying to figure out how being at home together worked... but now we in sync and I couldn't ask for a sweeter or smarter little girl!

Mikayla has been extremely perceptive from the start and this has grown with her. She is very aware of everything around her and you really can't pull anything past her. Her latest question that she asks ALL the time "Mama what you talking about?" Whether I am on the phone or talking with Dhrumil or to a friend... she wants to know everything.

Along with her perception comes her very sensitive and loving heart. She always wants to make sure everyone is ok, that everyone is having a good time. She gives long hugs and random kisses. She tells me she loves me in such a voice that melts my heart.

Mikayla loves to learn and one of our new games is to say a word, have her repeat it back and then explain the meaning. It is very funny when she says a word because it is usually made up... and her definitions always make us bite back grins.

Mikayla knows what she wants... and is very direct in saying so. She is a leader for sure and I think it will be interesting to watch her lead her brother. :) I think she takes after me in this respect.

She is now potty trained! HOORAY only one in diapers in a few weeks. The first time we tried it just wasn't working (more me than anything) and so we waited a few weeks, I prayed for patience... and after two days we had a major success! It has now been a little more than a month and she is doing so good!

Some of Mikayla's interests right now...

- Playing pretend (this just started and is so fun to watch her mind work!)
- Puzzles
- Reading together
- Cooking with us
- Playing with stickers
- Filling in her sticker charts
- Helping around the house
- Singing
- Walking Willoughby
- Playing at the park
- Crafts
- Coloring
- Dressing her "friends" (stuffed animals)

She also loves to talk about "baby brother" as she calls him and is very excited for him to come out of my tummy. I can't wait to see her as a big sister. She randomly puts her hand on my tummy and says "oh he's moving" or runs over to me and kisses my tummy.

There is so much more to say about my sweet one... but I am going to leave with one of her latest quotes. "Mama to get bigger I have to eat cookies, play in the leaves, drink water and sleep."

The End

36 weeks (last Saturday)
I can't believe I am now in the remaining weeks of my pregnancy!! I feel like I have been pregnant forever and as I think back on events, most of which were in Connecticut, I realize... "oh yup, I was pregnant then." 9/10 months really is a long time when you think about it.

I am now ready for this little man to make his appearance and yet am struggling with the feelings of wanting our sweet family of three to stay just us. I know the moment he is born he will fit right in, like he was always here... but I am hugging Mikayla just a little longer these last few days while she is my one and only baby.

This pregnancy has been SO much easier than my first, but the circumstances of life have been a little tougher to navigate. However, I do believe I have done a good job and can't believe everything that has happened in the past nine months.

Some of the majors...
- Bat in our room and the decision of the rabies vaccine (continuing to pray this hasn't affected the baby)
- Ending my career (for now) and leaving a wonderful company
- Saying goodbye to amazing friends and a place that had truly become home
- Moving to the farmlands of PA
- Becoming a stay at home mom
- Buying our first house
- Having a Rottweiler chase me and Willoughby and having me fall and go to the hospital
- Switching Drs and hospitals at 35 weeks

So I guess it was more mental challenges than physical this time around. But I made it through and am now looking at a ginormous belly and can't wait to meet the little guy who is inside.

Family of three for just a few more weeks
Physically at this point it is hard to move around. I feel like a HUGE hippo and feel like everyone is staring at me. :) I can hardly tie my shoes and find myself waddling. I am also starting to have problems playing the violin as my belly is getting in the way. Tomorrow is going to be my last time in the church orchestra because I am only going to get bigger. I just have to laugh at myself and know that this to will come to an end. Thank God I haven't gotten PUPPS again (a horrible itchy rash I had last time). The one thing that is a bit uncomfortable is how this baby is just all over the place. My belly makes contortions I never thought possible and I keep feeling like he is going to jump out... a preview of what is to come? Oh dear!

So there you have it... hopefully my last post on being pregnant. Looking forward to having my body back, though it will look like it has been through a war. I know it will have all been worth it of course the moment my hearts grows and I fall in love with another sweet baby of mine!

37 Weeks today!

Sunday, November 11, 2012

My Grandma

Meeting Mikayla for the first time
It is hard to know how to begin this post. I know we all grieve differently and I have found that for me, I become somewhat numb, and it is hard for my mind to wrap itself around the fact of life being a circle that begins and ends... I become emotionally stuck in a way.

My grandma passed away yesterday... almost a year to date after my grandpa.

Last night while I was trying to fall asleep I kept picturing her smiling, holding hands with my grandpa, meeting Jesus and celebrating in Heaven. Her mind was once again clear, no longer held captive by the dementia. Her body was no longer frail, but strong and healthy and she no longer knew the pain and hardship of the world.

What an amazing image, what amazing God we serve.

I still miss her though... she had been a fixture in my life... always there. Not until recently, after becoming a mother myself, have I truly appreciated all she taught me growing up. The stories she would write down for me in journals about her life, the cooking we would do together, the sewing, the crafts... the prayer. Living in Pennsylvania (she lived most of her life here) now has made me appreciate her all the more. She was the only grandma I knew (my maternal grandma died when I was three) and though not perfect, she was ever present in my life.

Our last visit
This morning as I was playing with Mikayla and helping her dress up all of her stuffed animals I couldn't help but know that her presence will linger... the doll quilts we were using to cover the animals were made by her, the crocheted doll sweaters, the little pillows... they were all her. So special to have these items and to share them with my daughter.

Of course God knew how this would all play out... but it still amazes me. We were able to go on a short road trip to see her just a month ago. I am so glad we did... I am so glad that Mikayla was able to come and be with her. Those special moments that we spent together and that hour that I spent just talking to her... my dad was also able to fly down shortly after us and then again he was with her right before she passed... and she knew he was there.

Soon I will write a post on my favorite stories about grandma. Something I can read back on and smile, something I can share with my children. But right now I am just going to be... just going to reflect on the impact she had on me, on the love she showed me.

I am at a loss... Lord help me make the most of my days here on earth and help me be a blessing to those who I pass by. Thank you for Judy Yoder and for all she taught me. Thank you that one day I will be held in her arms once again.