Wednesday, November 30, 2011

A Dollar

I spent a dollar on a snickers bar today.
Did I mentioned Dhrumil and I are doing a weight loss challenge? Whoever gets closest to their goal by our trip in March will get to choose the excursion we do in Jamaica. My personal goal has been to cut out most sugar.
I spent a dollar on a snickers bar today.
Forgot to mention it was 10:30 am and I was sitting at my computer daydreaming about caramel, nuts and chocolate. I was in the middle of a full out war in my head… don’t do it, just do it, don’t do it!
I spent a dollar on a snickers bar today.
Guess I should mention that I googled what one dollar can do… Do you know it could help alleviate poverty? I could have also doubled it every day to become a millionaire in 20 years.
I spent a dollar on a snickers bar today.
Snickers bar in hand I returned to my seat, only to notice the BRIGHT GREEN nutrition facts staring at me. Why do they have to be so noticeable? I broke off one small piece, hoping to dull the blaring fact that what I was about to put into my mouth was pure evil.
I spent a dollar on a snickers bar today.
That bite was good. I slipped the snickers bar into my desk drawer for later enjoyment. After a moment’s pause I took it right back out and threw it in the trash where it landed with a comforting BANG. I started to feel sick from the insane sugar that was now coursing through my veins.
I wasted a dollar on a snickers bar today. 

Next time I'll get Peanut M&Ms.

Monday, November 21, 2011

Personal Archives

Today I was reading through my old blog and some of my old posts on this blog and noticed a trend. It seems that through difficult times in my life I tend not to write for a while. I see this trend happening now due to the mixture of my busy schedule and the death of my grandpa. I guess that is why I haven't written about his death until now...

I haven't had a chance to just stop and take in the fact that my grandfather is no longer on this earth. In this moment, I am coming to the realization that I will not see him again until I am in heaven. Of course the knowledge of heaven and seeing him again and knowing he is happy and rejoicing gives me great joy, but there is still the dull painful ache that I have never experienced to this extent before. The world has lost a truly wonderful man and he will be remembered!

Grandpa would have been 90 this February and I have had some nod and say "ah" when mentioning this fact. I know I have done this to many who have had their grandparents die and now I wish I hadn't. The fact is... it doesn't matter what the age is... they were still very much a part of your life and the shock of death is still very real. 

I had some time to clean out my closet today and I came across a box of old letters and cards that date back to high school.  Now that I am in the profession of information management my mind immediately went to... are these records? Do these documents have purpose to my life and therefore need to be kept for an amount of time or can they be "deleted"? After shutting off my  business mind I noticed letter upon letter of encouragement from dear friends and family and also many from my grandparents. In that moment I was so thankful to have kept these personal "archives." I am so thankful God gave my grandma the gift of writing many many letters! Currently her mind is being taken over by dementia and I think it makes the death of my grandpa that much harder. I will cling to these letters as a piece of her and my grandpa to keep for years to come.

Your love for God was infectious. I always knew you were praying for me. You always came to all of my orchestra concerts, ballet recitals, plays... you name it, you and grandma were there. You supported me, you loved me. Thank you.

I think I was 3 when this picture was taken of us

So thankful Mikayla met grandpa!