To My Former Self

Dear Former Pre-Parent Self,

Hello. I thought I would write you a letter because I have some knowledge to share after being a parent for the past 2.5 years. I would share this knowledge with others who are not yet parents, but would they really listen? No. Why do you ask? Because you wouldn't have listened... and you also wouldn't have "gotten" it either. Why does the world work that way? Why do we learn the lessons AFTER the fact. Why does experience hold such a weight in everything we do? I guess it just goes to show that each phase in life will have its own difficulties, but will also have its own wonderfulness that we should truly embrace. Because if we don't... it will be gone. AND we will be writing our former selves letters.

Ok listen self... the list below is supposed to be comical. I wouldn't change where I am at in my life for a moment. But sometimes I just stop and think... what DID I do before my little pumpkin girl was following me everywhere? How DID it feel to not have someone staring at your while you went the bathroom? How was it that I got to places on time? And how come I took the smallest things for granted?

So I bring you this list of tidbits...

1. Before when you cleaned the kitchen, which I know wasn't a horribly daunting task, you should have ENJOYED it more. Enjoyed the yogurt and crumbs that were not all over the floor. Enjoyed the silence while you rinsed off the plates and placed them in the dishwasher. Enjoyed the fact that you could clean it quite quickly without numerous stops along the way to go color a picture, change a diaper, wipe a nose or try to get a certain little person to stop asking for another snack. EMBRACE the quiet kitchen. EMBRACE the fact that you are not exhausted (at least you may think you are exhausted, but listen YOU AREN'T) and clean those pots with a vengeance!

2. Your body... what can I say? Going through pregnancy is really going to do a number on it. Listen to what our mother told us FOREVER... seriously listen to her and LOVE how your body is now. Because it will never be the same again. Of course you can get back to the size you were before the baby, even smaller, BUT if you are one of the unfortunate souls like us... you will have battle scars. Enough said.

3. WHY are you sitting on the couch!? Get out! Enjoy running out of the house on a whim because you want to eat at the cute Thai place down the road. It is so so much easier now to get out because you don't have to worry about anyone BUT yourself! Ah... what that must feel like. Remind me would you, please?

4. Give Willoughby another hug. Your sweet child-dog is going to turn into an actual dog the moment you have a child. Seriously... I know it is so hard to comprehend, but he will. Don't be such a stickler about who watches him if you go away for the weekend because when you become a parent you won't care as much... you have larger things to worry about.

5. You will have THAT child. Yes I know... you think you will never have "THAT" child, but you will! I am not talking about anything in particular right now, just know that your child will not always be a perfect angel. Yes your child will scream at some point in a store, yes she will have a fit while you are eating in a restaurant, yes she will not sleep very well at times and YES the only vegetable she will like for a year will be peas. My advice? Practice on not sweating the small stuff... it will come in handy.

6. Give you husband a kiss... ok now give him another one. Yes you can still give your husband a kiss now, but you might be too distracted at times or too exhausted to even fathom the idea of getting off of the couch at the end of a long hard day, covered in snot, to walk over to him and give him a kiss. So do it now. Treasure the time that you have alone... again yes you will be alone, at night after bedtime, but now you are alone alone and you will never be young and alone again. So drink it in! And that grocery shopping you do together that seems like a pain? Have FUN because you just have to worry about yourselves and not about the little person that may be yelling "YOGURT" the whole time.

You know, I am sure I could think of some other really silly things to tell you to enjoy now... but I can't think of them right now.  That's because a cute little mini you and Dhrumil is waking up from her nap and talking to herself right now, waiting for her mommy to come get her. The fact is that once you reach this stage in life, you will truly enjoy having your sweet little girl around. You will understand a love that is so different than you have ever felt before and you will marvel at the fact that even though you can't clean the kitchen in peace you feel more blessed than ever before. So now I guess I speak to my future self of tomorrow. ENJOY these moments even though some days may feel to be the hardest you have ever had. Being a mom is tough work, I know that, but guess what? You have had tough days before and in the end what matters is these times... easy or tough...will be gone in an INSTANT so embrace what comes... even if it is tinkle and poop on the floor.

Love,
Your wiser-by-the-moment self