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| Four generations |
I have heard this term in books. Today I looked up fleeting to see what it really means… “Passing or fading quickly” and in the Thesaurus… “brief, momentary, transitory and evanescent.” These definitions bring tears to my eyes and a picture in my mind.
Last week Mikayla and I flew to visit my parents in Indiana one last time before they move to NYC (More on that trip to come) While there it was very important for me to go and visit my Yoder Grandparents in Ohio. They have been having a difficult time lately… afflicted by things that come with age. My Grandpa can hardly see and is in a wheelchair because he fell. My grandma succumbing to dementia, though she can still remember us. They have both been moved to separate rooms on the assisted living wing of the wonderful home they are living in. More like a “college for the old” than a facility for the weary.
When I went into my Grandma’s room I was shocked by how frail and little she looked… same with my grandpa. Grandma was slightly confused, but was excited to see me. When they saw Mikayla joy lit their faces and I was hit with the thought of this new life was giving large smiles to the old life passing through. While sitting in the lobby, watching Mikayla play and toddle back and forth between my parents and grandparents, I had a new appreciation for life and the moments that are meant to be cherished.
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| Grandma talking to Mikayla about her shoes |
We happened to be in the lobby during the June birthday celebration. A man on an accordion and one on the drums played and sang to their hearts content. I enjoyed looking around and watching the elders sing along. Mikayla was in her glory… dancing with my mom, walking from one end to the other, being the center of attention. Amidst the joy and naivety of a child who has yet been blemished my life’s hardships it wasn’t hard to miss the looks on those around me. My parents showed love of their grandchild, but also exhaustion and a bit of sadness that is brought by the stresses of having older parents. My Grandpa showed concern through his eyes for the love of his life whose mind is leaving it’s body. And my Grandma? She sat quietly, a peaceful but faraway look in her eyes. I wondered where she was… perhaps thoughts of her younger days had come upon her and she had been transported to a place where she was witty, young and beautiful again.
Saying goodbye was the hardest. After helping my Grandma into her chair and covering her with a blanket I bent to hug her and whisper to her what I know I wanted her to hear while she still remembered who I was… “You have been and are the best Grandma, thank you.” As tears filled both of our eyes we clung to each other and as I looked deeply into her cloudy blue eyes I remembered a time not too long ago where her eyes were clear and she was teaching me to cook and sew.
As I left their room, my dad’s comforting arm around my shoulders, immense sadness filling my heart, I knew one thing for sure. Life is fleeting. My grandparents, like the rest of us, are just passing through. This life is but a brief stop on the way to all of the Glory and Splendor waiting for us in Heaven. That thought gave me comfort.
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| Special family |
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| Giving five to Grandpa |
2 comments:
Ahhh, Elisabeth, I've already had an emotional day, and then I read this. We're beginning to lose my grandma to Alzheimer's, too. It's probably the most devastating thing for loved ones to go through. What a touching and poignant post to share. Thank you.
EB, way to get a pregnant woman to cry. I saw my 93 year old grandmother in Germany in April, and I'm sad that it was probably the last time I'll see her. She's had dementia for about five years now, but now she's at the point where she spends most of her days staring off into the distance and puttering around her apartment. Well, she was in April. Now she's gone through a bout of pneumonia and is really declining. The hardest thing about it isn't losing her, because she'll always stay with me, but in looking at my Dad, who's far away but is watching his mother become unable to be alone. That's really what breaks my heart. And makes me grateful for the last visit.
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